My girlfriend's dog died, but I managed to find her an identical one. She was livid - "What the bleeding hell am I going to do with two dead dogs"?
One Liners :lol:
Started by
Nelly Vx
, Oct 09 2012 10:02 PM
692 replies to this topic
#681
hairy
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Posted 11 July 2021 - 08:01 PM
#682
hairy
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Posted 25 July 2021 - 09:48 AM
The inventor of auto-correct has died ... his funnel is tomato.
#683
hairy
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Posted 22 August 2021 - 05:14 PM
When my mate found out they had a cure for dyslexia he said it was like music to his arse.
#684
hairy
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Posted 22 August 2021 - 07:02 PM
I had a happy childhood, my dad used to put me inside old tyres and roll me down hills - those were good years.
#685
Gadget2
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Posted 23 August 2021 - 07:39 PM
Today I slipped on a banana skin............Then I took it off because it looked ridiculous!
#686
Gadget2
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Posted 06 September 2021 - 06:11 AM
I took two vigra tablets instead of my sleeping pills.....................I've been up all night!
#687
hairy
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Posted 09 October 2021 - 04:25 PM
I've just been watching a documentary about sponges ... it was very absorbing.
#688
hairy
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Posted 15 October 2021 - 05:54 PM
Tried calling the tinnitus hotline ... no answer ... just kept ringing.
#689
hairy
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Posted 16 October 2021 - 01:54 PM
My wife asked if I would like one of those things that tests your blood pressure for Christmas? I replied “No way is your mum coming for dinner again."
Edited by hairy, 16 October 2021 - 01:54 PM.
#690
hairy
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Posted Yesterday, 05:06 PM
I pulled a couple of stunners in Bangkok, took them back to my place and realised I'd hit the jackpot. We had 6 matching balls!!!
#691
Ivor
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Posted Yesterday, 10:57 PM
I think you've posted that one before...I pulled a couple of stunners in Bangkok, took them back to my place and realised I'd hit the jackpot. We had 6 matching balls!!!
#692
hairy
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Posted Today, 03:58 PM
I've bought my lady some crotchless knickers as a treat for Halloween ... nothing sexual, just so she can get a better grip on her broomstick.
#693
Ivor
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Posted Today, 06:28 PM
Now that, my friend, is truly funny, possibly the funniest uetI've bought my lady some crotchless knickers as a treat for Halloween ... nothing sexual, just so she can get a better grip on her broomstick.
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