I've spent the last few years and few thousand trying to get my car driving better but not adding power etc. I'm not sure exactly your spec so you may already have some on these bits, and also you mention you want better handling in the corners so is that feel or outright grip? But my 2p is...
1. Ditch the 5 stud for lotus 4stud forged wheels immediately!!! Massive improvement in feel and makes the car more finger tippy. Plus if you go for the lightest ultras you'll save half of your target as unsprung mass which according to Williams F1 equates to a benefit of multiple times that as onboard weight.
2. Look at new seats, I have tried a few and Tillett B5s are mega comfy on long trips (and I mean Germany in a day long) and much better on the track for making you feel part of the car. I've tried Reverie Mulsannes but they were back breaking for my shape. B6 will grip you much more but they need you to have snake hips which I don't.
3. Possibly change the steering wheel, again it's all feel over performance but I fitted a Reverie carbon jobbie on my car and I know it's 100% in the mind but everyone whose driven the car agrees it just feels nicer to drive somehow. It's smaller and nicely shaped etc, and looks cool as f***!
4. Lastly I would be wary of aero stuff, you may end up making things worse.
I want to run 18/17" combo wheels with wider tyres. So the weight will be increased over 17/16" unfortunately.
I defo agree that feeling comfortable in your seat and having a nice feel steering wheel and good driving position will allow you to drive more relaxed and probably quicker. Several driving books also say the same.
Aero is always a contentious area to cover. I intend to try a few variations out. As most time is made up along straights, perhaps minimal rear wing and sticky out parts will be better...but, a compromise is probably the middle ground.