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#681 hairy

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Posted 11 July 2021 - 08:01 PM

My girlfriend's dog died, but I managed to find her an identical one. She was livid - "What the bleeding hell am I going to do with two dead dogs"?



#682 hairy

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Posted 25 July 2021 - 09:48 AM

The inventor of auto-correct has died ... his funnel is tomato.



#683 hairy

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Posted 22 August 2021 - 05:14 PM

When my mate found out they had a cure for dyslexia he said it was like music to his arse.


#684 hairy

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Posted 22 August 2021 - 07:02 PM

I had a happy childhood, my dad used to put me inside old tyres and roll me down hills -  those were good years.



#685 Gadget2

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Posted 23 August 2021 - 07:39 PM


Today I slipped on a banana skin............Then I took it off because it looked ridiculous!

#686 hairy

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Posted 22 December 2024 - 08:22 PM

To the person that lost their iphone 15 in ASDA today....will you please stop ringing my wifes Xmas present



#687 hairy

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Posted 26 January 2025 - 08:27 PM

The auto pilot on my Tesla insists on driving in the outside lane ... I think it's going too far right.



#688 PaulCP

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Posted 02 February 2025 - 07:22 PM

When I die I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandad, not shouting and screaming like the passengers in his car



#689 oblomov

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Posted 02 February 2025 - 07:45 PM

When I die I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandad, not shouting and screaming like the passengers in his car

The old ones are the best ones :D

 



#690 PaulCP

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Posted 02 February 2025 - 09:21 PM

 

When I die I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandad, not shouting and screaming like the passengers in his car

The old ones are the best ones :D

 

One of Spike’s many classics ????



#691 casino

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Posted 09 February 2025 - 07:14 PM

My girlfriend got the results for her dental hygienist exams. She said she scraped through. 



#692 KurtVerbose

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Posted 10 February 2025 - 01:16 PM

My girlfriend got the results for her dental hygienist exams. She said she scraped through. 

 

That's not even a proper joke. It's more like filler.



#693 Ivor

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Posted 10 February 2025 - 04:48 PM


My girlfriend got the results for her dental hygienist exams. She said she scraped through.


That's not even a proper joke. It's more like filler.
Fangs for that ...

#694 Ivor

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    and now bees

Posted 10 February 2025 - 04:48 PM


My girlfriend got the results for her dental hygienist exams. She said she scraped through.


That's not even a proper joke. It's more like filler.
Fangs for that ...




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