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One Liners :lol:


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#1 Nelly Vx

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Posted 09 October 2012 - 10:02 PM

Hey have you ever been picked up by the Fuzz ? No .......... Been swung round by the tits a few times :lol:

#2 MrSimba

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Posted 09 October 2012 - 10:29 PM

"If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong..."

:)

Edited by MrSimba, 09 October 2012 - 10:37 PM.


#3 Nelly Vx

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Posted 09 October 2012 - 10:30 PM

What's brown and sticky ....... A stick :lol:

#4 G-Bob

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Posted 09 October 2012 - 10:38 PM

"What did one trappist monk say to the other?"

#5 JimmyJamJerusalem

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Posted 09 October 2012 - 11:20 PM

"If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong..."

:)


Oooh nice!!

#6 westie

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 07:23 AM

Have you ever shoed a horse? No, but i once told a donkey to fcuk off !

Edited by westie, 10 October 2012 - 07:25 AM.


#7 Goosenka

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 07:48 AM

I met my wife in Australia. I said, what the bloody hell are you doing here? Taxi for one please......

#8 Harry Hornet

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 08:52 AM

Knock knock Who's there? The interupting sheep The interup.....................baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

#9 ghand

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 02:24 PM

I asked a scotsman did he have spots when he was young. He replied achh neeeee

#10 Goosenka

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 02:29 PM

Getting my mother-in-law to accept a free foreign holiday was easy. The hard part was convincing her Dignitas was Swiss for spa. :mellow:

#11 Goosenka

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 02:32 PM

Angus called in to see his friend Donald to find he was stripping the wallpaper from the walls. Rather obviously, he remarked "You're decorating, I see." to which Donald replied "Naw. I'm moving house."

:mellow:

#12 Goosenka

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 02:37 PM

I bought my wife a wooden leg for Christmas. It's not her main present, just a stocking filler...... :mellow:

#13 fluffyskg

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 03:07 PM

I bought my wife a wooden leg for Christmas.

It's not her main present, just a stocking filler......

:mellow:


Imnotworthy

#14 ghand

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 04:01 PM

A skeleton goes to the bar and asks for a pint of beer and a mop. :lol:

#15 Nelly Vx

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 06:01 PM

I said to my girlfriend you have a big fanny ... She said why say it twice :lol:

#16 warren t

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 06:40 PM

why do parents take the kids to tescos?.............to smack them.

#17 Chris C

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 07:27 PM

What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis!

#18 ghand

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 08:54 PM

I can do worse than that :lol: Whats black and white and can't turn around ? A nun in a corridor with a spear through her neck

#19 Hark

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 10:43 PM

Wtf lol

#20 davemate

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Posted 10 October 2012 - 10:45 PM

I referred to a colleague as a "mabelline sponsored baboon on heat"




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